Digital Generation Gap

The other day I was talking on the phone to my 16 year old niece in Canada, who was telling me about her new haircut.  I said "Sounds cute - email me a picture" to which she responded "Just look on my Facebook page"  Duh!

The conversation reminded me of a couple of articles that I came across a few weeks ago about parenting in this digital age.  The first, from the New York Times, talks about how text messaging is changing how parents and kids communicate.  The second, from the Washington Post, is about the perils and pitfalls of parents becoming "Facebook friends" with their kids.

Both articles make some interesting points about privacy.  I'd never though of cell phones and text messaging as enabling kids to have more privacy, but as the New York Times article points out its a lot harder for your parents to know what you are up to if you are accessing the Internet from your cell phone, or sending a text message to a friend rather than talking on the phone where your parent can hear at least one side of the conversation.

I also thought the Washington Post quote from Steve Jones, University of Illinois Professor and digital communications expert was interesting -

"What they want to keep most private is not something they wish to keep from strangers, it's the things they want to keep from people that know them," he said. "It's 'I don't care what someone who doesn't know me finds out. But I do care about what someone I know intimately [does].' "

On the one hand, a technology gives parents a much greater ability to stay in touch with their kids, but on the other hand that same technology allows kids to conduct a much greater portion of their lives in ways that are hidden from their parents.

Part of growing up is expanding the parts of your life that you want to keep private from your parents, so there is nothing new in that.  What is new I think is the extent to which technology is enabling that process to happen earlier and faster than ever before.

The articles also made me think that PVLD's policy of requiring parental permission for minors to access the Internet via library computers is of greater symbolic than practical value.  Kids who want to use technology to "hide" stuff from their parents will find a way to do it whether they use library computers or not, and kids like my niece who have little to hide will let even their aunts and uncles be their Facebook friends.  I hope we aren't creating a false sense of security.       

Comments

[Marcia Brandt]

As the mother of an 18 and 21 year old I concur with the thoughts here. Teens (and pre-teens) gravitate toward relationships with peers and now they can do that 24/7. As parents, even ones who have good relationships with their kids, we have decreasing influence. Does it matter? I'm afraid it will...